DictionaryWow, it's been a long time since I've posted anything on here, but perhaps this is the best day to get back to sharing some thoughts this way… Though I am always glad to have an extra day off to catch up on things (for example a blog), but on Memorial Day, the reason for the day off always makes me sad…
I wrote about this mixture of joy and grief a couple years ago… since then, this truth has been reinforced far too many more times…
As I re-read that, even though I wrote it — I realized that I needed the reminder today as well!
The title was “Remember, Celebrate, Honor" And a lady named Jesse Brooks asked the question and shared on the linked website.
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“How should a Christian view Memorial Day?” you might ask…
With a mixture of sadness and joy, is my simple answer.
In Afghanistan, now 5 years ago, I was blessed to have consistent fellowship with a chaplain who said Christians should be the happiest and yet at the same time the saddest people on earth. Happy because we know the One who gives salvation by His grace, but sad because of the ones we know who reject this salvation which is offered.
Chaplain Mike Foskett and I met up 2 years ago as I was on a trip to the states for training. I visited him on the ship he was preparing to deploy on just after pulling into port. While we were in Afghanistan three years ago, we knew of servicemen and women who had died there. We both had also deployed many times and lost marines and sailors we knew more personally. On Memorial Day, we both have a mixture of sadness and joy when we think back on those who are no longer with us. Although we can have joy because those we know accepted Christ’s sacrifice will be reunited with us again in the Kingdom, we also have sadness because we know others who rejected Him and we will never see them again. (On that trip I saw another friend – one who is no longer with us because of an unexplained suicide prior to his retirement ceremony just last month – so this Memorial Day is also a reminder of those service members who have suffered from the difficult to understand debilitating depression and sought the only way out they could see in that moment…)
Chaplain Foskett and I are not alone in this experience of loss and the joy and sorrow that accompanies it. Many who have served in the military as well as any family members or friends who are close to the military know that with this kind of service comes great sacrifice. The weight of which is seldom fully grasped. I can't make you grasp it by answering the question of how you should view the day we celebrate the lives of those who have given the last full measure of devotion, but I do hope to shed perhaps new light on what we can do to honor them and those they've left behind. I'm reminded of the Proverb “the heart knows its own bitterness and a stranger does not share in its joy" (Proverbs 14:10).
Sometimes the greatest thing we can understand is that there's some things we'll never understand. Experience is required to gain this kind of understanding and fortunately most won't experience the loss of a friend in training, combat, or after the return from a deployment when some become casualties of suicide. Depending on how someone dies, the memories of that person during Memorial Day can vary in degrees of painfulness, but it's all painful. I've learned that by elevating one thing we can unintentionally diminish other things so I'll attempt to avoid doing so here. It can be very difficult to find any aspect of joy based on the circumstances surrounding the death of someone in the military. What can provide some comfort however is that “in God's sight, the death of His faithful servants is very precious” (Psalm 116:15).
War is an ugly thing. We might not want to be judgmental of those who are ignorant of the cost of war. Those who have isolated themselves from the reality of sacrifice for this nation may be doing this on purpose!
Some service members are offended if they are thanked on Memorial Day; be patient with those who don't understand and kindly and tactfully educate them. Forward them this blog post or some of the verses I've mentioned.
During this time of celebration and remembrance we gave an opportunity to be intentional with how we initiate conversations with those who have lost someone. But how do you communicate this concept to those who have no frame of reference or even a desire to understand it? Well, maybe you can't, sometimes it might be better just to pray God will open their eyes and they might be able to see the truth. There's a great example of sacrifice that God is communicating through the example given to us by our men and women in uniform; it's the example Jesus gave a couple thousand years ago… and He wants us to remember Him as we remember our lost friends – for He alone is able to provide the comfort we really need.
Remembering is a big deal to God. The number of times He told the Israelites to remember should have been more than sufficient to keep them from falling into sin and worshiping other gods. When Jesus instituted the Lord’s Supper, He said to “Do this in remembrance of Me." We are forgetful people for sure. Without reminders, we simply drift and repeat the mistakes of others or even ones we've made ourselves.
As Jesus, Who laid down His life declared, no greater love exists than what is on display when someone selflessly sacrifices their life for another. But it should be noted however that as Christians we should not need the horrors of war to provide the opportunity to lay our lives down. We should be ready, willing and able to lay our life down 10 minutes at a time – putting the needs of others before our own.
So in summary, Christians ought to have a unique view not just of Memorial Day but of all life in general. In fact we are admonished to set our eyes not in what is seen but what is unseen. The physical is temporal but the spiritual is eternal, and so one day we will no longer celebrate Memorial Day because we will be ever with the Lord in Glory, worshiping and praising Him alone. We therefore can use Memorial Day as an awesome opportunity to do what God reminded us to do over and over again: Remember! So much honor is due to those who have laid down their lives and I believe it honors God to honor each other. My challenge to you this Memorial Day is to live it with honor.
Semper Fidelis.
Adam.